January 25, 2023
Q&A 096

🏄‍♂️ Feel

Because I switched from Pocket to Readwise Reader as a read-it-later tool recently, I bumped into tons of stuff I saved 10 years ago, which is a fun experience. It's a little time capsule showing the stuff that I was interested in or keeping me up at night.

One 2013 article from Peter Bregman drew my attention, as its subject -procrastination- is something I still feel I haven't mastered yet. The quintessence of the article is how our fear of feeling something unpleasant is often preventing us to take action.

The author came to insights on the matter as he saw early morning surfers at the beach, each of them ending their rides with falling down, but loving the experience every time. He then asks himself:

"So why don’t we live life that way? Why don’t we accept falling — even if it’s a failure — as part of the ride?"

I immediately thought of Andrew Huberman's dopamine masterclass and the ways to trick your system into loving the friction of doing hard things. I also remembered Nathan Furr's lessons on 'reframing' as a way to tackle anxiety under uncertainty. Peter Bregman advocates a similar strategy.

"Have that difficult conversation. Listen without defensiveness when your colleague criticizes you. Name the elephant in the room. Get rejected. And feel it all. Feel the anticipation of the risk. Feel the pre-risk cringe. Then, during the risk, and after, take a deep breath and feel that too."

Embracing the emotion without judging it - like in meditation - seems like the timeless recipe again. I'll see what I can cook up.